Sent our youngest back to her school this afternoon. Our second has returned to her school yesterday. The house is quiet and it feels empty again. 😦
When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
When the road you’re trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit,
Rest, if you must, but don’t you quit!
Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As every one of us sometimes learns,
And many a failure turns about,
When he might have won had he stuck it out,
Don’t give up though the pace seems slow,
You may succeed with another blow.
Often the goal is nearer than,
It seems to a faint and faltering man,
Often the struggler has given up,
When he might have captured the victor’s cup,
And he learned too late when the night came down,
How close he was to the golden crown.
Success is failure turned inside out,
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems so far,
So stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit,
It’s when things seem worst that you must not quit!
When I was a student, I had this poem stuck on the wall by my study desk. When I went into employment, I took this poem with me. I hung it at my cubicle. There were times when I felt like giving up but this poem kept reminding me not to quit. Yesterday, I couriered this poem to my Cennarizmi children. Since the ones on the Internet are not suitable to be printed (the words are blurry), I decided to do it from scratch. I turned it into bookmarks. I sent it for printing and lamination. Then, couriered the bookmarks to the kids. Alhamdulillah, the kids have received them today. I truly hope they like the poem as much as I do.
I was driving to the carwash this morning when suddenly something hit me. I wasn’t trying to figure things out. It just came to my senses. Out of blue. Made me broke down into tears.
Just like many others, I always compare myself and what I have with others. There were even times when I wished I could enjoy what others have, where others go. But deep inside I know they will forever remain as wishes.
However, this morning, it hit me that I have not been counting my blessings. I felt very bad. There is one thing that not many have and that is children. I have 8 of my own and last Saturday, Allah lent me another 17 for me to care! Subhanallah. I feel so blessed and grateful. Only then I realized, these are my rizq. These children will be my saviors in the hereafter if I carried out my responsibilities as I should. MasyaAllah. Thank you, o Allah. I regret for not seeing this as a blessing before. Please forgive me.😥
Ever since my children started going to preschool, my husband and I have made it a point to always be involved in their journey as a student. My involvement in my children’s studies intensified after I gave up my full time employment. One of the things that made me decide to leave the air conditioned office, the smart-looking office outfits and the luxury of having lunch with officemates at various eateries and started becoming my children’s supir, wearing worn out attire day in day out, was when I realized that I didn’t give enough time for my children. My youngest who was 4 at that time suddenly could read and I was caught by surprise! When did that happen? How come I didn’t notice it? I have missed a major milestone in my child’s life! That was it. Coupled by the problem of finding and keeping a maid made the tough decision easier to be made. I did go back to being employed but it only lasted for 6 months. My mind and heart were always at home, always wondering about the children – what they were doing, whether they have completed their homework, etc.
Fast forward 10 years, my eldest is now in one of the local universities doing his foundation, skipping Form 5. My second will be taking her PT3 and my youngest is in Form 2. All 3 in different geographical location. One in Perak, one in Terengganu and one in Wilayah Persekutuan. For the past few years, we have been very active in the parents support group for MRSM Kota Putra. Mainly because our son was one of the students in the IGCSE pioneering batch. We wanted to make sure that despite MARA’s decision to stop the program 3 years later, the pioneers and the 2nd batch continued to get the best of education under the IGCSE program. We really enjoyed our “work” and the close friendship built with other parents. From a group of about 12 concerned parents, it has now grown to have over 200 parents. Alhamdulillah. We continued to contribute in whatever way we can to help the school with other parents. Last week, I created another group just for the Form 5 sudents’ parents. Although my son is no longer in the school, I feel belonged to the group and I have grown close to the Form 5 children. I offered to remain in the group together with my husband, to continue assisting the parents and alhamdulillah, they welcomed our stay. 😊
Yesterday, we had our first meeting. At the end of the meeting, they suddenly told us that they have bought some token of appreciation for all our efforts and help. Despite our protest, they insisted that we accept the gifts. We were so touched. Who would have thought? We didn’t expect our involvement to be acknowledged in such a grandiose way. We are involved because we feel belonged and nothing more. Anyway, I am blogging this so that I can recall this sweet moment again. May Allah bless all these parents who have worked equally hard for the success of our children.
This was what my husband wrote to the group:
“Terimakasih kepada semua sahabat. Tidak terucap dengan perkataan, dan tidak terungkap dengan tulisan di sini, akan rasa terharunya kami suami isteri di atas hadiah penghargaan tadi. Berkali2 saya sebut tadi bahawa bagi kami suami isteri, ini adalah suatu precedent yang tidak wajar. Allah sahajalah yang tahu betapa komited nya setiap dan semua orang dari kita tahun lepas dalam menjayakan semua aktiviti ke arah kecemerlangan anak2 kita di kopu. Memencilkan hanya kami berdua untuk diberi penghargaan sebegitu adalah suatu precedent yang tidak wajar. Mohon diampuni dan dimaafkan bahasa saya jika kurang berhemah. Kami akhirnya menerima hadiah penghargaan tadi atas dasar persahabatan dan ukhuwwah islamiyyah sesama kita. Kami dapat rasakan keistimewaan dan kemanisan ukhuwwah yang telah dipupuk ini, dan insya Allah akan terus hidup subur untuk jangka masa yang panjang melangkaui keterlibatan kita sebagai ibu bapa anak2 mrsm kota putra. Jazakumullah khairan. Dengan rasa penuh terharu dan besar hati, kami bawa pulang hadiah penghargaan tuan puan sahabat semua, dan doa kami yang tidak putus2 agar sahabat semua seisi keluarga diberikan sebaik balasan di akhirat nanti, serta terus diberkati hidup dan dilimpahi kejayaan di dunia dan akhirat oleh Allah Azzawajalla.”
We arrived home around 4 pm and at 6 pm, I decided to make my first churros after a friend posted hers on FB. After googling for the recipe, I headed to the kitchen and voila!! Churros ala Liza with cheese dip. The kids love them and I am a happy mother! 😍
Yup!! Managed to push myself again and went to my second aerobics class. Different studio though (in Kuang). This second class was quite intensive and it was for 2 hours! Pengsan. But very happy with my achievement *pat on my back!* hahahaha.. 😄
I have been procrastinating this for nearly a year, or maybe more than a year! Tonight, I just bulldozed my way…well, not really. My husband drove me to the studio. I finally pushed myself to attend an aerobics class. And it was marvelous!! I really enjoyed myself. When I arrived I felt out of place. Everyone seemed to have their own circle of friends. They were sitting together in small groups chatting away. I went straight up to a lady who looked like an instructor. I introduced myself and made the payment (RM 10). Then I went to find myself a spot when i saw a lady who smiled at me. I smiled back at her and introduced myself. Her name is Yus, of the same age as I am. Apparently, Yus is Ros’s friend, also a teacher at SMK Saujana Utama.
Anyway, to cut the story short, I enjoyed myself and look forward to the next session.🙂